Oh, gawd. Why am I bother making this review? Not only this is wasting my time, watching the movie made me throw away less than 2 hours of my precious life-time. I mean, this movie is a piece of garbage. Flat storylines, flat acting, flat special effect...flacid. Pffft! I mean, this movie is directed by a guy who directed Taxi! An un-funny movie. The only decent thing he directed was Barbershop, but we're talking about a different kind of movie here. I don't even remember nor care what the storyline is. Okay, lemme try;

When an experimental space voyage goes awry, four people are changed by cosmic rays. Reed Richards (Ioan Gruffudd), inventor and leader of the group gains the ability to stretch his body, and takes the name, Mr. Fantastic. His girlfriend, Sue Storm (Jessica Alba), gains the ability to turn invisible and create force fields, calling herself the Invisible Woman. Her younger brother Johnny Storm (Chris Evans) gains the ability to control fire, including covering his own body with flame, becoming the Human Torch. Ben Grimm (Michael Chikilis) is turned into a super-strong rock creature calling himself Thing. Together, they use their unique powers to explore the strange aspects of the world, and to foil the evil plans of Doctor Doom (Julian McMahon).

See? I don't even bother to write my own premise, it's 12 AM, gimme a break. I have to copy paste. I can't believe people like Michael Chiklis and Julian McMahon are in this movie. I mean, who wrote this crap? It's a superheroes movie with dissapointment. Compare to other superhero movies like Spider-Man, Batman Begins and X-Men, this movie is not even in the same league as them. There is no moral messages whatsoever. They wrongly cast Jessica Alba as Susan Storm. And I feel pity with Michael Chiklis who is a brilliant actor, and I love him both in The Commish and The Shield as this hard ass cop, but why he reduce his ability in this movie? Why do you lower yourself, Chiklis? Answer me! The dialogues, ugh -- come on! "Flame on!", "It's clobbering time!" Are those suppose to be funny? I wanna throw my pop corn hearing those!

This movie is big, expensive, dumb and also unforgivable dull. There was a kid watching this movie with his dad in the theater, and I was sitting two rows behind them. The kid just lost his interest watching the movie and started to walked around and climbed the chair behind him and sat next to me. His dad had to dragged him to go back to his chair again, and I was like "Aw, man. That's okay. The kid's bored because he knows this movie is a piece of crap!" I mean, it's campy (although it's not as bad as Batman & Robin, amen for that!), it's silly, it's boring, it's cheesy...what else to describe how bad this movie is? It seems the moviemakers thinks that we, the audience, are dumb people. They are so lazy, it makes me angry. I want to smack Chris Evans, although even he knows that he's in a bad movie, so he was trying to make the best out of it. My dearest cousin has a crush on him after watching this movie and said that she likes the movie. Then again, I never trust her judgement about movies nor boyfriends. This movie is not for everyone who are looking for excitement and good storylines, or even a decent special effect. This movie is for people like the kid's dad and my cousin who doesn't bother or need to think and considers that Kevin Federline is a good musician. Sorry to drag K-Fed here, but I can't help it. Eugh...

Ratings: 1/10